one story alone.

“Life cannot be understood flat on a page. It has to be lived; a person has to get out of his head, has to fall in love, has to memorize poems, has to jump off bridges into rivers, has to stand in an empty desert and whisper sonnets under his breath… We get one story, you and I, and one story alone. God has established the elements, the setting and the climax and resolution. It would be a crime not to venture out, wouldn’t it?” 

 — Donald Miller

i can’t really say i have a way with words. i don’t always put them together very eloquently. until recently, i really wasn’t a fan of reading, but there is something i love very much… and that’s a great story.

i’ve been in an interesting season in my life. one that isn’t over. you see, the seasons in my life don’t change as frequently as the season’s in nature do. they take time to mull over, and to wade through. it’s a learning process for me.

where i am in this season of life right now, is reminding me of many things. it’s teaching me many things.

it’s finding something to laugh at when it seems as though there isn’t much to laugh about.

it’s seeing the beauty in everything, whether beautiful by the world’s standards or not.

it’s accepting where you are, even if it’s not where you want to be.

we only get one story. one chance at this life. one shot to do it how it’s meant to be done.

and it’s like my eyes are open again. it’s like i’m seeing the world through a different pair of eyes. and they’re not my eyes. they’re His.

so this is me, venturing out. doing things differently. doing things i’ve never done.

because i’m not who i was.

i remember…

i remember waking up from being asleep on the drive with my dad when he moved me to college. we were getting off the exit to bluefield, and it hit me. i was heading to college.

i remember my great grandfather (Jood) on halloween the year before he died. my sister and i walked into his living room dressed in our costumes, and we asked him what he was for halloween, and he told us he was mickey mouse because mickey was on the blanket he was using in his recliner. i was probably 5.

i remember my aunt sending my sister and i on a pirate scavenger hunt one year in emerald isle on vacation. the scavenger hunt obviously ended on the beach with a treasure chest filled with neat stuff, and after that we ran and jumped in the ocean with all of our clothes on. i remember saying that my mom was going to be SO MAD at us for being soaken wet in our clothes, but she wasn’t. she probably laughed.

i remember being in my dorm room on the night before spring break my freshman year of college and getting the phone call that my 10 year old cousin blake had passed away from a strong fight with leukemia. i immediately got sick, and then went and hung out in the SAC with 4 amazing girls who did a really good job at helping me take my mind off of it. it helped for a little while.

i remember walking down the beach with a best friend at night. i remember breathing in the air, and seeing the stars and thinking about how i never ever wanted to forget that moment for the rest of my life. i’ve been really good at remembering so far.

today, i remember something different.

sacrifice.

pain.

a cross.

a life given.

blood poured out…

spilled.

for you, and for me.

and while He was dying, for us…

He was remembering.

remembering us.

so this day, with everything else that you’re remembering about your life, or about what you need to be doing, remember this.

He lived. He died. He rose again.

for you.

for me.

for us.

there are so many things that i remember. moments in my life. times that have passed, and things that i never want to let go.

never let Him go.

He holds you close.

and He was thinking of you on that day.

and He remembered.

“Jesus, remember me when you enter your kingdom.” – Luke 23:42

He remembered you.

“Remember me
In a Bible cracked and faded by the years
Remember me
In a santuary filled with silent prayers

And age to age
And heart to heart
Bound by grace and peace
Child of wonder, Child of God
I’ll remember you
Remember Me

Remember me
When the color of the sunset fills the sky
Remember me
When you pray and the tears of joy
fall from your eyes

Remember me
When the children leave
their Sunday school with smiles
Remember me
When they’re old enough to teach
Old enough to preach
Old enough to leave

Age to age and heart to heart
Child of wonder child of God

Remember me”

-Mark Schultz

just stay with me.

You could plant me like a tree beside a river
You could tangle me in soil and let my roots run wild
And I would blossom like a flower in the desert
But for now just let me cry

You could raise me like a banner in a battle
Put victory like a fire behind my shining eyes
And I would drift like falling snow over the embers
But for now just let me lie

Bind up these broken bones
Mercy bend and breathe me back to life
But not before You show me how to die

Set me like a star before the morning
Like a song that steals the darkness from a world asleep
And I’ll illuminate the path You’ve laid before me
But for now just let me be

Bind up these broken bones
Mercy bend and breathe me back to life
But not before You show me how to die
Oh, not before You show me how to die

So let me go like a leaf upon the water
Let me brave the wild currents flowing to the sea
And I will disappear into a deeper beauty
But for now just stay with me
God, for now just stay with me…

“Show Me” by Audrey Assad

i don’t even have the words to say. this song says it all.

what a beautiful representation of easter.

Mercy bend and breathe me back to life
But not before You show me how to die…

five minute friday. {on distance…}

It’s Friday! 🙂 I’m not sure what this weekend holds, but I’m excited that it’s a weekend! It hasn’t been a crazy insane week, but it’s been enough of one where I’m excited to have 2 days away from work!
So here goes my 5 minutes…

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It was the summer of 2002, and we ventured around the world, to a place that was much different from where we came. The children wore the same clothes everyday, hardly any of them had shoes on their feet, but they all carried so much love in their eyes and in their hearts.

We ventured around the world, and we found ourselves. We were the teachers, but in the end, they taught us so much more.

We ventured around the world, and travelled a great distance, but in actuality, it wasn’t a great distance at all. Our hearts were so close. We bonded.

We ventured around the world, and ate foods we’d never tried before, heard a language we’d never heard before, and found a love that we’d never felt before. For our team, for those children, for an entire town that welcomed us in like their own.

We ventured around the world, and I left a piece of my heart with those children. I know they probably don’t remember me, but I will always remember them. No distance is too far when hearts are connected. and lives have been changed.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I will always miss Slovakia. I will always miss the children in Lunik 9, and I will always want to go back there and take way too many pictures. Always…

there’s beauty in the breakdown.

Have you ever waited for something, longed for something, wished for something so much, and then it wasn’t what you expected when it finally came about?

I walk from my front door to my car every morning, and look around in disgust at what I see all around me. Everything is yellow. It’s not that I don’t like the color yellow, it’s actually grown on me a lot in the past couple of years… I really just can’t stand pollen. It’s covered my car, its all over the windows and steps at my house. It really does just come in and take over the first part of spring, doesn’t it? It makes me sneeze, it gives me headaches, it really just makes me frustrated with this new weather that I seem to can’t even really enjoy without my eyes itching and my head screaming at me to run and take cover inside.

Isn’t this just like our lives sometimes? We wait for something beautiful to happen, and then something else happens and covers it up, or takes some of the beauty away from what we were expecting.

Just like pollen makes the flowers bloom and grow, the strength we gain from “toughing out the hard stuff” makes us bloom and grow as well.

“Trust God from the bottom of your heart; dont try to figure out everything on your own. Listen for God’s voice in everything you do, and everywhere you go; He’s the one who will keep you on track.” – Proverbs 3:5-6 (The Message)

“God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God and God in him. In this way, love is made complete.” – 1 John 16-17

five minute friday. {if you met me…}

i’m going to try something new. if i’m having a hard time coming up with something to write on my own, i should try someone’s challenge to write for 5 minutes on a topic that they provide. i found this challenge at thegypsymama.com , and i’m going to try and do it every friday.

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if you met me, you’d see the blue in my eyes, and my love for this world. you’d probably notice a scar on my chin and wonder where it came from. you might hear me say “ya’ll” a few times, and hopefully that would help you appreciate my southern upbringing. if you met me, i think you’d enjoy learning more about me… i’m too complex for my own good sometimes. if you met me, i’m sure you’d have me laughing in no time.

if you met me, i hope you’d understand that i love people, unsweet tea, the color orange, and making memories. if you haven’t met me, it sure would be fun to meet you. 🙂

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needless to say, i didn’t get to write for 5 minutes straight, but i went with it anyways.

that’s what happens, life gets interrupted sometimes.

greater things are yet to come.

i’m in the middle of making a big decision.

okay, well… it’s probably not that big in the grand scheme of things, but when you’re someone like me, and you don’t make decisions very well at all, it can absolutely define itself as a big decision.

i don’t always like to do things by myself. i’ve never eaten at a restaurant by myself. i’ve never been to the movies by myself. i don’t necessarily have a fear of being alone, but i enjoy spending time with other people, and surrounding myself with people who make me laugh, and who make me smile, and who help me to see the good in the world and in other people.

but this adventure, this next step, is something i’m doing for me.

it’s something i’m doing by myself.

and i have mixed emotions about it.

and i’ve weighed out the pros and cons.

and the pros outweigh the cons big time.

and i think i’m going to take the plunge.

and say yes.

and do this.

because i can.

and i’m excited.

and i’m ready.

because greater things are yet to come…

i believe it.