beautiful things.

so yesterday was another day spent in relaxation mode. i attempted to upload some pictures to facebook, and it took forever and actually never worked, so i gave up. i watched 2 discs (not episodes, discs) of grey’s anatomy, caught up on some thank you cards, and just enjoyed my bed for one more day. it was awesome.

i went to a friends for her stella & dot party, and it was good to be in her house since i hadn’t been there since she got married in january. seeing her sister was fun too. i love those girls. i left there, and went to the 5pm service at church, where i lost it.

God’s been doing a lot of really neat things in my heart lately. I’m accepting some things that it has taken me a while to wrap my head around, and I’m becoming more “accepting” with where I am in life right now. I don’t want to use the comfortable, because when I think about that word, it makes me think I’m sitting back and not participating in what’s going on. But I’m feeling a lot better about some things that it’s taken me a while to feel better about, and the service at Hope last night affirmed a lot of that.

Our pastor, David, talked about the church, and being the church. He said some very valid points that helped me remember that church shouldn’t be necessarily something that we do, but instead should be a reflection of how we live. This, of course, was incredibly comforting to me. Yes, church is something that I do… sometimes Wednesday night, and most Sunday mornings, (or evenings, now since my church has a 5pm service!) but so much more than that, church should be how I’m living my life. It’s not just a building, with chairs and screens for words that we sing. It should be our way of life. It should be the way we’re sharing the good news with others on a daily basis with the way that we live. It’s fellowship. It’s praying. It’s sharing. It’s changing me. You can read the dialogue that my pastor wrote/read here: http://wordandway.blogspot.com/2011/03/what-i-believe-about-church.html

So then, as always, the music at Hope is awesome. During the offering, they sang a song that I’d heard only once before, but it didn’t stick with me. Yesterday, it hit me like a ton of bricks. It went right along with what I was talking about earlier… that situation that I’m becoming better about.

All this pain
I wonder if I’ll ever find my way?
I wonder if my life could really change at all?
All this earth
Could all that is lost ever be found?
Could a garden come up from this ground at all?

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

All around
Hope is springing up from this old ground
Out of chaos life is being found in You

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

You make me new, You are making me new
You make me new, You are making me new…

And after the service, I had an amazing mexican dinner with a really good guy friend who helped me remember why God puts amazing people in our lives. To teach us things. To show us different outlooks on life. To help us remember who we are, and who we’re becoming. I am so thankful for this friendship. For these moments where we get to catch up, and be there for each other. You know who you are, and thanks. I’m glad you’re home.

You make beautiful things, You make beautiful things out of us…

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today has been a beautiful day.

woke up this morning, drove to sycamore square and sat in a gazebo with 4 friends that i love dearly. ate a slice of delicious breakfast pizza from ukrop’s, because i refuse to call it martin’s. came home and hung a birthday present on the wall in my bedroom from a girl who’s friendship to me is incredibly beautiful. fell asleep watching grey’s anatomy in my bed, because i haven’t taken a saturday afternoon nap in i can’t even tell you how long. texted with a good friend who always has this amazing way of putting a smile on my face. and now, i’m getting ready to take a long shower (because i can) and throw on something comfy to go meet my parents for dinner and wherever else the night leads me.

its days like this, where i can just stop, and relax, that i find so incredibly comforting. it doesn’t happen all that often, but when it does, it’s needed. it’s beautiful… even if the weather outside is gray and dreary. even if i didn’t cross everything off of my to-do list.

i paused, and i took a breath.

and it’s been beautiful.

lost and found.

so it’s been a while… and i know this, because some of you have reminded me. there’s just been a lot going on in life here lately, and not that i’ve been too busy to write, but i just feel like i don’t always know what to write about. and today, i decided that i don’t have to write about anything, i should just write.

so, i turned 25 last week… after spending the night in an airport all alone and having the team i coach place 8th at nationals… their best placement EVER. what an awesome feeling… to know that i helped contribute to some of that. my heart and my head are kind of not in the same place when it comes to coaching and to synchro, but i’m hoping i can get it all worked out.

i’m excited about this year. for a while, i was scared of turning a quarter of a century old. the thought of being half way to 50, or 5 years away from 30 weren’t always the most satisfying, but life’s too short to be scared of a stupid number. this year holds something big… i don’t know what it is, i don’t need to know what it is… but something big is going to happen… and i’m ready. bring it on, life.

my hair is short again. it’s cute, i like it. it’s growing on me. something different.

we’re starting a reunion group this weekend with some ladies that i teamed on the last chrysalis flight with. they are all women that i value in my life, and i’m excited to see what God’s going to do through this group. i’m not anticipating anything, i’m just ready!

i am so thankful for the people who i call friends, and who live up to that tag. there are some people in this world who will walk all over you and knock you down and treat you like crap, but they don’t even hold a candle to those people who take the time to care about you, and love you, and encourage you to be better. i am learning that i have some of both people in my life right now, and enough is enough. moving on from those who are hurtful, not helpful.

i miss bluefield.

go after a life of love as if your life depended on it, because it does.

overuse i love you, but when you use it, mean it. i might say those words a lot, but i mean them. there is so much to love about this life… why focus on the bad or the people who bring you down? focus on those who you love and who love you. like i said before, i’m learning how to do this with some people in my life, and it turns out, that i don’t need them because they don’t need me.

so tonight, i’m going to watch the spiders game, cross my fingers, cheer loud and pray that they win. and i’ll look around the room (wherever we are…) and i’ll be thankful for the people that are there with me, because they’ve taught me more than they’ll ever know about how genuine people can be, and how real love can be shared between friends.

GO SPIDERS!

little things… wednesday.

{life got away from me yesterday. whoops!}

i often tell people that i have a chemical imbalance in my brain that makes me laugh way harder than i ever should at certain things. there are just times when something strikes me as so incredibly funny, that i laugh so hard that i can’t breathe, and there are tears running down my face, and i end up making these funny noises and usually saying “i can’t… i can’t” in the middle of it all because i can’t do anything. i can’t stop laughing. i can’t breathe.

i love moments like that.

and for me, they happen a lot.

and for that i’m grateful.

laughter is a good kind of medicine.

<3